My color

C: Pink really isn't my color. Well... on my feet anyway.

When deciding between black or pink shoes.

C 5 years old

Imaginary Friend

C: My imaginary friend is the first dog ever. His name is Dead Cookie but he's not dead. His last secret is that he likes to wear shoes. He rides motorcycles and surfboards. And he goes to 7-11. And everytime he goes bowling he knocks down every pin.

C 5 years old

Something Black

Z and C are playing I Spy.
C: I spy something black.
Z guesses and guesses.
Z: I give up. What is it?
C: Its mamma!
Z: uhh.... she's not black....
C: Well, she's a sassy lady so she is kinda black.
WTF who teaches my kids these things?!

Z 8 years old
C 5 years old

Doctor

I am getting dressed C spots a tshirt in my drawer.
C: Oh! Oh! Wear that one! With Harry Potter!
Me: Who is on it?
C: I mean Doctor.
Me: Doctor Who?
C (thoroughly disgusted): That is not Doctor Who! Mom! That is Doctor Horrible!

C 5 years old

Cereal killers

I pour a bowl of cereal for C. Turn to Z...
Me: want some cereal?
Z: I want some life.
Me: C just got the last of it. All we have is cheerios.
Z: Dang it!
C: You can have my life and I'll have cheerios.
Z: Aww! Thanks C!
C bursts into tears.
Me: What's wrong?!
C: I don't like cheerios!!
Me: then why did you offer?!
C: I didn't think he would accept!

Z 8 years old
C 5 years old

Knock Knock

Chelsea just walked up to me... Knock Knock!
Me: Who's there?
Chels: uhh... I thought that would make you do the joke...

C 4 years old

Cheetah

Zach: What do you hope your fortune says?
Chels: I hope mine says i will grow up to be a cheetah!

Z 7 years old
C 4 years old